I had an "aha" moment

I was reading a blog entry today and the blogger was mentioning how she doesn't like to be photographed because she worries about her weight in the pictures. I smiled to myself in that knowing way we all have when we read someone else's blog and think "yeah, I know how that goes!" I don't even want to post a picture on my blog yet. But then I started thinking about how I try not to be in pictures because I don't want someone thinking how fat I look. And I realized that I'm very rarely in my son's pictures. I took that one when we went to the zoo, but when we went on vacation: no pictures of me. Went to the sprayground: no pictures of me. Went to the Children's Museum: no pictures of me. And I started to cry. Because I don't want my son to look back and not have any pictures of all the fun things he did with his mommy all because she thought she looked too fat. I was up 2.4 lbs at weigh in and I did not think I had gained that much AT ALL! So I am officially remotivated (if that's not a word, it is now!) So thank you to that blogger (I think she knows who she is!) for opening my eyes to a very important part of my life I am missing out on!

What a weekend!

I don't even know where to start. I have been walking with my buddy a couple nights a week, and last night was a pretty cool evening, so we decided to tackle a new walking/biking trail they put in near our house. It's about 3.5 miles, and let me tell you it is MAJOR. The hills were killing us. I had to laugh (at the end after the sweat was drying and my breathing didn't sound like a freight train) because as we were chugging along, I was pushing Ty in the stroller, and he kepy leaning forward and pointing and shouting "GO GO GO!!!" People were like encouraging us saying how brutal it can be. But we did it!! Our faces were beet red and boy were we sweaty, but it was good bonding. I also shared with her my new favorite snacks: The Fiber One chocolate oat bars and also a wedge of Laughing Cow light spreadable cheese and reduced fat triscuits. Yum. One wedge + seven triscuits = 3 points!

(If you're squeamish, you might want to stop here. It's nothing too bad, but I thought I'd throw in the disclaimer just in case.)

Then I came home and got out my new mandolin slicer. (There are some of you who may already know where this story is headed.) I was so excited to use it because I was going to use it to chop up veggies and fruit to keep in the fridge for the week. Yeah, I sliced the tip of my pinkie finger off. Not the whole entire finger, but a substantial bit of my finger is now gone and won't grow back. I was horrified. I still am. I have been wounded in my quest for health and weight loss. I couldn't look, I just felt that I'd cut myself, grabbed a paper towl and wrapped my finger in it and went to find my husband. I must have been totally shocked, because I found him and said "please, don't say I told you so or anything smart, but I cut my finger and I can't look at it." Then I started crying. There was a lot of blood, and it hurts. A lot. And I can't look at cucumber slices because that's what I was cutting, and I'm a little scarred now I think. Tom had to throw away the plate of them for me. I asked if they could glue everything back together (my finger, not the cucumbers), but everyone looked at me like I had lost it. Other than that debacle, I had a good weekend point wise. I have my weigh in tonight, so I'll post the results later.

Me vs. The Candy Bar

I really like the fact that my employer likes to show that they appreciate their employees, but really. Do they have to give us all a candy bar to show it? And not a mini candy bar, not even a regular sized one. The KING SIZED 100 Grand bar (because they think we're "grand" Cute, huh? Not.) I stared at it for a while, and then I gave it to my coworker next to me. Now you may think, why would you do that to your coworker? Well, he's younger and more in shape than me and I felt bad throwing it away. Watching him eat it was kind of rewarding, because he reallllly enjoyed that candy bar. What would you call that? Eating junk food by proxy? Whatever it is, I didn't eat the candy bar, and for me that's big. It goes back to not eating the office birthday cake. These are usually my downfalls. I've been reading a lot of other blogs lately, and I really have to say that has helped me with this whole process. The feeling of community and the support everyone shares is very inspiring. I grab my water bottle and settle in to read some blogs and it really keeps me from snacking. That seems to be a common feeling I've noticed some other bloggers mentioning, so I just wanted to chime in and say I agree!